Did you lack affirmation as a child? Do you constantly need to be recognized as being worthy, loved, or needed? Do you become insecure when your spouse or friend does not respond to your needs right away?
Understand that if a male friend is not noticing and responding to your needs, it is often not that he is deliberately choosing not to affirm and comfort you, but because he is simply obliviously unaware of your needs. Know that it takes men four times longer to notice subtle social cues than it does women.
Consider that if you constantly need to be affirmed and recognized, you might have a belief that was engraved in your mind by the father-of-lies: that you are insignificant…disposable…lacking in quality.
FOR HE SATISFIES THE THIRSTY AND FILLS THE HUNGRY WITH GOOD THINGS
(Psalm 107:9).
I bless you to seek your affirmation from God. Turn your beliefs of insignificance over to Him, for He satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things.
HOW GREAT IS THE LOVE THE FATHER HAS LAVISHED ON US, THAT WE SHOULD BE CALLED CHILDREN OF GOD!
(1 John 3:1).
Do not attack your spouse or your male friend for the belief that you do not count. This might trigger a belief of rejection in him. The result would be two people living in pain, practicing their sinful defense patterns on each other. Instead, invite your Perfect Father to lavish His Love on your feelings of insignificance.
THE LORD WILL GUIDE YOU ALWAYS; HE WILL SATISFY YOUR NEEDS IN A SUN-SCORCHED LAND AND WILL STRENGTHEN YOUR FRAME. YOU WILL BE LIKE A WELL-WATERED GARDEN, LIKE A SPRING WHOSE WATERS NEVER FAIL
(Isaiah 58:11).
Do you feel worthy, loved, and needed? If not, do you turn to constant affirmation to get these needs met?
Know that affirmation from people will not get your needs met. Invite God to satisfy your need for significance. Allow Him to tell you that you count…that you carry weight…that you matter. Then you will be affirmed.
PRAYER: Most High, I admit that I do not feel worthy, loved, and needed; therefore, I turn this matter over to You, Lord. Satisfy my never-ending thirst for affirmation with Your Love, O God. Then, I will be affirmed.
Maintain an Awareness
When your heart hurts, both the Lord Jesus and the father-of-lies stand ready to lead you out of that pain to a solution.